We Will All Be Unskillful At Times

In this episode of How I Ally, Lucinda sits down with comedian and storyteller Jessica Wood for a conversation that is equal parts hilarious, unfiltered, and deeply human.

From growing up in chaos to navigating identity, motherhood, and societal expectations, Jess brings humor to the hardest truths—and challenges everything we think we’re “supposed” to be as women.

This episode explores the tension between freedom and responsibility, the silence around women’s mental health, and the radical act of choosing your own life.

In this episode, we cover:

• Using comedy to process trauma—and why timing matters
• The silence and stigma around postpartum mental health and suicide
• Why there’s no safe space for women to be honest about how they feel
• The pressure on mothers to be “happy” and selfless at all times
• The double standard in how men vs. women talk about parenting
• What it means to choose not to have children—and the judgment that follows
• Growing up with instability, neglect, and unconventional parenting
• How early experiences shape identity, relationships, and resilience

• The invisible labor of women as “support systems” for everyone else
• Radical self-acceptance and letting go of shame
• The concept of “dukkha”—and why we don’t need to punish ourselves for being human

Key Takeaways

• Women are expected to feel—but only certain feelings.
• Motherhood is idealized, but rarely discussed honestly.
• Choosing your life (with or without children) is an act of autonomy.
• We are hardest on ourselves—and we don’t have to be.
• Kindness toward yourself is the foundation for everything else.

Memorable Quotes

• “There’s no safe space to say how you actually feel.”
• “Women are told how to feel—and how not to feel.”
• “You’re basically a human support beam.”
• “We’re always going to be unskillful sometimes. That’s being human.”
• “Be nice to yourself so we can be nice to each other.”

About the Guest

Jessica Wood (aka “Jess Wood”) is a comedian and storyteller known for her raw, fearless humor and deeply personal material. Her work blends trauma, truth, and comedy in a way that challenges audiences while making them laugh.

Her comedy album Breaking Bad Barbie is coming out soon.


Connect

Follow Lucinda: @lucindarogerskoza
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